You can't depend on your eyes when your
imagination is out of focus.
- Mark Twain
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the
company.
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
First, God created idiots. That was just for
practice. Then He created school boards.
- Mark Twain
I've lived a long life and seen a lot of hard
times...most of which never happened.
- Mark Twain
The Gentle Reader will never, never know what a
consummate ass he can become, until he goes abroad. I
speak now, of course, in the supposition that the Gentle
Reader has not been abroad, and therefore is not already
a consummate ass.
--Mark Twain, part of travelog from his trip to Egypt.
Keep away from people who try to belittle your
ambitions. Small people always do that, but the
really great make you feel that you, too, can
become great.
- Mark Twain
Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat
what you like and let the food fight it out
inside.
- Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Suppose you were an idiot... And suppose you were
a member of Congress... But I repeat myself.
- Mark Twain
Always do the right thing. This will gratify some
people and astonish the rest.
- Mark Twain
Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely
laid an egg cackles as if she has laid an
asteroid.
- Mark Twain
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or
no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one
is listening. Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.
- Mark Twain
If you pick up a starving dog and make him
prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the
principal difference between a dog and a man
- Mark Twain
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember
anything
- Mark Twain